Pereira suggests using the GIVE strategies when you need to maintain a difficult relationship:
Be gentle and courteous.
Act interested and really listen to the other person.
Validate where the other person is coming from.
Use an easy manner when you communicate. Smile and use humor.
If you attempt to engage with a covert narcissist, consider Pereira’s strategies for effective communication. She calls the first the DEAR MAN strategy.
Describe the situation factually.
Express your feelings and perceptions about the situation.
Assert yourself by asking for what you want or by saying no.
Reinforce or reward by explaining the positive effects of getting what you want or need and the negative effects of not getting what you want or need.
Stay mindful. Focus on your goals. Ignore distractions, including threats or attacks.
Appear confident and effective.
Negotiate and offer alternatives.